Pubdate: Thu, 18 Feb 2016
Source: Portland Mercury (OR)
Column: Cannabuzz: The Week in Cannabis
Copyright: 2016 The Portland Mercury
Author: Josh Jardine


I SAY, "Weed News Roundup"! And you say, "Cool, let's do it." Because 
you went to a private school that didn't have a sports team with 
call-and-response cheers. Way to go, Waldorf.

Ida-No, You've Got to Be Kidding-Last year, two very stoned and 
stupid young men, driving from Las Vegas to Montana in a vehicle 
filled with 20 pounds of cannabis, made a stop in Idaho. Not for 
french fries, but to call the cops on themselves, asking to be 
arrested. No, really. Here's a portion of the transcript of their 911 call:

WORLD'S WORST SMUGGLER: "Hi, uh, we're the two dumbasses that got 
caught trying to bring some stuff through your border and all your 
cops are just driving around us like a bunch of jack wagons, and I 
just really would like for you guys to end it. If you could help me 
out with that, we would like to just get on with it."

DISPATCHER: "You got caught doing what?"

SELF-PROCLAIMED DUMBASS: "Ahh, god, okay, we kind of got spooked here 
trying to bring some stuff across your Idaho border. A bunch of your 
cops are driving around in a bunch of civilian cars not wanting to 
pick us up. I don't know what's the deal... it's getting cold out 
here, man. I just want to get warm."

Police say they were not following the men, and when they arrived, 
the two Mensa members were waiting with their hands behind their 
heads and said, "We're surrendering." Were dabs involved? Edibles? 
Does it even matter?

Kush Cash-The money you spend on that quarter of kind every couple of 
weeks (or days-no judgment) is starting to add up. According to a new 
report from ArcView and New Frontier, sales of medical and 
recreational cannabis have risen from $4.6 billion in 2014 to $5.4 
billion in 2015. This year, sales are expected to hit $6.7 billion, 
and are forecast to hit a staggering $21.8 billion by 2020. The 
industry is growing by more than 30 percent every year, and adult-use 
recreational sales skyrocketed from $351 million in 2014 to $998 
million in 2015, an increase of a whopping 184 percent.

In Colorado, sales hit nearly one billion dollars in 2015 
($996,184,788 to be exact), which brought in $135 million in taxes 
and fees, with school construction getting $35 million. So when 
people ask why you smoke weed, tell them you are doing it for the 
children. To quote Mrs. Lovejoy, "Won't somebody please think of the 

Facebook and Instagram Still Hate Cannabis-Instagram and Facebook are 
shutting down medical and recreational cannabis dispensary accounts, 
in addition to the accounts of many non-cannabis industry folks who 
post too many bud shots. reports: "Under the Regulated 
Goods section of Facebook's Community Standards, it says, 'We 
prohibit any attempts by unauthorized dealers to purchase, sell, or 
trade prescription drugs, marijuana, or firearms.' So, by state laws, 
medical marijuana dispensaries are following the rules. But Facebook 
admitted to US News and World Report on Friday that legal businesses 
may still have their pages deleted on the basis that selling 
marijuana remains a federal crime."

There has been speculation that this isn't necessarily Facebook's 
doing, but rather prohibitionists and jealous competitors who look 
for cannabis-related posts to flag. Of course, everyone's still free 
to post endless photos of alcohol. Will Facebook and Instagram 
continue to take this ludicrous position after cannabis is 
rescheduled and decriminalized? To quote Reverend Lovejoy this time, 
"Once the government approves something, it's no longer immoral!"

Don't Panic, It's Organic. Wait... Do Panic-Eugene-based cannabis 
testing lab extraordinaire OG Analytical showed why they are they are 
superstars of the industry recently. According to Noelle Crombie at 
the Oregonian, OG Analytical found that the pesticide Guardian had a 
super-special secret ingredient not listed on the label: the chemical 
abamectin. OG Analytical informed state regulators, who took the 
highly unusual step of pulling the product from all store shelves in 
Oregon, and asked growers to stop using it. Guardian has shut down 
its operations, and their president said, "It seems like people are 
pointing a finger at us. I would rather not comment on anything and 
take the Fifth." Guardian was a product used by many cannabis 
growers, and this incident underscores the importance of having all 
cannabis lab tested.
- ---
MAP posted-by: Jay Bergstrom