Pubdate: Fri, 18 Apr 2014
Source: Trentonian, The (NJ)
Copyright: 2014 The Trentonian
Contact:  http://www.trentonian.com
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1006
Author: Whoopi Goldberg
Note: Whoopi Goldberg writes for The Cannibist, a product of the Denver Post.

MY VAPE PEN AND I, A LOVE STORY

My vape pen and I maintain a mostly private relationship. Sure, I'll 
sometimes show my pen to a friend or share her with a close 
confidant. But mostly it's just she and I working through my pain. 
And her ability to helpme live comfortably with glaucoma makes her 
one of the more important figures in my day to day.

When I show her to a friend, the reaction 99 percent of the time is: 
"Holy shit, where did you get this and how can I get me one?" They're 
seriously that blown away by my vape pen. And they should be. She's 
that amazing.

As I write my debut column for The Cannabist, talking about this 
newly legal weed and admiring the states that have had the foresight 
to legalize medical marijuana, I'm most tempted to extol the virtues 
of the vape pen. I didn't anticipate this first column to be such a 
love story, some sort of semi-romantic comedy. But it works, and it's 
true, and so here we go.

The vape pen has changed my life. No, I'm not exaggerating. In fact, 
her name is Sippy. Yes, she's a she. And yes, I named her Sippy 
because I take tiny, little sips - sassy sips, even-from her. And 
with each sip comes relief - from pressure, pain, stress, discomfort. 
But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Maybe two years ago once I stopped smoking cigarettes, I really tried 
to smoke a joint. I had to "really try" because I was having a hard 
time with it. Suddenly I had virginal lungs, and I was feeling quite 
annoyed about it all.

"I think I have something you might like," my daughter said after I 
told her about my difficulty with the joint. Four days later, she 
showed up and brought me this giant thing in a box. It had a big tube 
and a sturdy base and it was fairly large, and as soon as I saw it I 
knew I couldn't do whatever it required of me.

"It's a vaporizer," my daughter told me. But I knew it was too much. 
She said, "Here, you can slowly inhale as much as you want. And it's 
vapor, not smoke." When she was with me on the East Coast, I knew I 
could work that desktop vaporizer. But as soon as she left it was too 
complicated.

Seven weeks later my daughter was saying it again: "I think I have 
something you might like." She was coming back, and I said, "No way." 
She said, "Just take a sip." And that's what I did.

I took a sip. It was beautiful. And my pen and I have been together ever since.

I love my Sippy, it's true. And now there are so many different kinds 
of vape pens - some with coils, some you have to clean out, some you 
don't have to clean. I like the simple pens with cartridges of THC 
oil because, if you're not a smoker or you can't inhale deeply, it's 
a wonderful way of ingesting cannabis.

What kind of kush is in my vape pen at the moment? The 
indica-dominant Platinum OG, of course.

These pens are light, compact and portable. The vapor is inoffensive 
and subtle. And for me a lot of the new pot is too strong - and when 
I take edibles I rarely come out of the room. With the vape pen, you 
have more control over how much THC you ingest. If my headache is 
just starting, I know a short sip will take care of it. If the 
pressure inside my head is pounding, then two or three sips is a 
better prescription.

These glaucoma-induced headaches come on like freight trains - like, 
BOOM, my head starts hurting, my eyes start bugging, my whole body 
starts to tense up. But then I find her, and it relaxes everything 
and calms everything. It helps my head stop hurting, and with 
glaucoma your eyes ache, and she takes the ache out. It's wonderful.

The high is different, too. It feels like a gentle, warm breeze at 
the beach. It's like someone undoing a vise grip, very slowly. It's 
not overpowering - and I'm certainly not looking for that high high. 
I'm looking for relief.
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MAP posted-by: Jay Bergstrom