Pubdate: Sat, 20 Aug 2005
Source: Summit Daily News (CO)
Copyright: 2005 Summit Daily News
Contact:  http://www.summitdaily.com/home.php
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/587
Author: Lori Adams
Referenced: http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v05.n1344.a04.html

PARENTS SHOULD SHARE THE LESSONS THEY LEARNED ABOUT DRINKING

RE: Teenage Wasteland (SDN, Aug. 15)

The comments from Sheriff John Minor, who was quoted in the article
"Teenage Wasteland?" that "these are not new trends" and (we tried)
"to find a party without getting busted" when we were teenagers may be
true, but I think it would be incomplete and irresponsible to leave it
at that.

That is not the whole story.

Just because we may have done the same things when we were young does
not mean that it's OK for us to look the other way while our kids do
them. We can't assume that they will be OK just because we managed to
make it through.

My guess is that each one of us has at least one story of a person we
knew who didn't make it through unscathed, or perhaps did not even
live to look back and laugh about their teenage antics.

Telling your teenagers not to drink or do drugs may seem hypocritical
to parents who did those things when they were young. I have struggled
with this issue and know that it's hard to be honest about these
things with your kids.

But, I think that it would be irresponsible, as parents, not to do
everything we can to try to protect them from the very real dangers of
using drugs and alcohol as teenagers.

I like what author Philip Van Munching says in his book, "Boys Will
Put You On A Pedestal (so they can look up your skirt) - A Dad's
Advice For Daughters."

"We worry that if we're honest, you'll take it as a big green light to
go out and do the same dumb things we did. We're not so much worried
that you'll show the same stupidity we did; we're afraid you won't
have the same dumb luck we had. We don't want you to be the story
people tell their kids to convince them not to drink."

The story I tell is of my boyfriend who fell asleep at the wheel after
drinking beer all day and died in a single car accident. I hope never
to have to go through anything that horrible again, and hope that no
teens or parents in our community ever have to experience such a tragedy.

So, if it is "hypocritical" to tell your children not to do what you
did then I'll be the first in line. I don't much like to count on
"luck" to do my parenting. We, who survived in spite of the stupid
things we did, need to be responsible and tell our kids the whole story.

 Lori Adams

Silverthorne
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MAP posted-by: Larry Seguin