Pubdate: Wed, 17 Aug 2005
Source: Nanton News (CN AB)
Copyright: 2005 Nanton News
Contact:  http://www.nantonnews.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/3200
Author: Laurie Henthorne
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/youth.htm (Youth)

GROWING UP IS HARD TO DO

Breaking Ground

My son and daughter aren't regular readers of this column, but they usually 
ask me what I've written about once I've emailed it off to The News.

Last week's column about crystal meth made my ten-year-old son ask, "Why 
would anybody do drugs?"

Tough question.

I told him that some people are so convinced that they're unhappy that they 
try drugs to make them happy. Then I explained the rebound effect drugs 
provide, which leads to less and less high, and more and more craving for 
the high, which leads back to the drug.

I also told him that some people - especially young people - try drugs 
because they're bored or curious or just because someone makes them an 
offer they don't know how to refuse.

Tough answers.

The conversation that followed had a lot to do with how to say no to your 
friends, even if they're all doing something together.

Growing up in a rural community can seem like serving time at the end of 
the earth for some youngsters. "I can't wait to be out of school and out of 
here," is a familiar refrain, whether the small town is in Alberta or 
Saskatchewan or Iowa.

The lights are brighter in the big city; that's where exciting things 
happen. City kids will tell you nothing's happening there, either, but 
that's another story.

I came across an old Calvin and Hobbes cartoon this week that summed up 
this restless feeling of childhood.

Careening down a steep, wooded hill in a wagon with Hobbes tucked in behind 
him, Calvin says, "I can't believe how dull my life is. It's so boring here."

As he zooms through the woods, ducking branches, he goes on, "Nothing ever 
changes around here. Nothing ever happens."

As the wagon charges over the bank of a creek and he and Hobbes tumble 
through the air, Calvin says, "It seems as if (hang on) everybody but me 
gets to have an exciting life."

The last frame shows the two of them sitting in the creek next to the 
overturned wagon, Hobbes shaking water out of his ear and saying, 
"Actually, I'd like LESS excitement in my life."

Calvin yells back, "WHY? Are you doing fun things when I'm not around?? 
Huh? ARE YOU?"

Cartoonist Bill Watterson used Calvin to show the restlessness of youth 
that looks past what's actually happening now to another place full of 
perceived excitement. And then, to provide perspective, he let Hobbes live 
in the here and now, to acknowledge that immediate events can be exciting, too.

It's normal for kids to be like Calvin, to want to get to the next exciting 
thing, whether it's in the next town or the next grade. Childhood and 
adolescence can be frustrating periods of waiting to be bigger and older 
and allowed to do more, further from home.

Childhood and adolescence are also bright and shining periods which most 
adults recall with some degree of fondness. I wouldn't want to relive those 
times in my life, but I like to remember them.

I, too, felt the angst of teenage frustration. I didn't think the things I 
was doing were interesting or exciting. I was bored with my life and 
curious about what else was "out there."

What I learned from that time was that good judgment comes from experience, 
and experience often comes from bad judgment. I also learned that I could 
choose what was important and interesting by investing my time and energy.

And then, when I was choosing my own future, I chose a rural community. 
When I came to Nanton, I made my life in a place much like the place I left.

Adulthood is often ironic, more Hobbes the cartoon tiger's perspective than 
cartoon Calvin's.

George Bernard Shaw said, "Youth is wasted on the young."

I agree that the energy and vitality of youth goes unappreciated, but I 
don't agree that it's wasted. Only the young could live their lives of 
continual energy and anticipation which lead to adulthood. Only the young 
could keep up with the demands of growth and learning which give them 
experience and transform them into adults.
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MAP posted-by: Beth