Pubdate: Fri, 06 Jun 2003
Source: Edwardsville Intelligencer (IL)
Copyright: 2003 Edwardsville Publishing Company.
Contact:  http://www.goedwardsville.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/1431
Author: Nanette Clark
Note: Nanette Clar is a freelance writer and longtime resident of 
Edwardsville.
Note: Ms. Clark discusses drug policy in the 13th paragraph.

NOT JUST PIGS HAVE PORK

Should I be relieved or dismayed that there is now -- federally -- a tax 
cut bill? I read a column over the weekend that listed pork -- $119.1 
million -- for outrageously bodacious line items. There are not enough 
pages in a newspaper to print the budget, but they listed the Web site and 
off I ran.

Of the amount my colleagues outlined, the most ridiculous is an 
appropriation for $500,000 for the "First Tee Program." This is a program 
for the federal government to familiarize juvenile delinquents with the 
sport of golf. In high school sports, I found this game to be one of 
frustration and nonsense for me.

I can hit the nice big softball with the bat. I can even occasionally hit a 
smaller baseball with a bat. However, the golf ball and golf club are a tee 
totally -- pun intended -- different matter. In my hands, a golf club is a 
deadly, if not lethal, weapon. For a lot less you could probably teach them 
to pick up trash along the highway.

Not to mention the small size and lethal qualities of the ball and what it 
can do to an unsuspecting victim. I believe that teaching young offenders 
who probably have anger/hate problems that beating a club at things is more 
satisfying is not a positive move.

A trip to the Web site for Citizens Against Government Waste by any 
sensible person is enough to make a sensitive and poor person like me 
homicidal. In addition, I know I am risking scathing comments from my 
Republican representatives on how I have misinterpreted these items or 
their intent, but come on. I am no budgetary genius but if I was this bad 
my husband would probably have left me, just let me rant. Here are the gems 
I found at www.cagw.org.

First, I chose the Foreign Operations budget because it always amazes me 
how much money we send out of the country that they tell us little ol' 
taxpayers we don't have money for national health insurance or seniors as 
they take more out of our pitiful incomes for:

I added up $22.35 million for support of foreign organizations. Now I am 
not against organizations, but every one I have ever belonged to collected 
dues from its members and raised their own money. Ever wonder what happened 
to the Edwardsville Jaycee Picnic? I didn't belong but even I noticed it 
was missing.

I sure am glad Edwardsville hasn't appropriated my money to support them, 
though I am sad that they have hit hard times. Nevertheless, the latest 
reports are that they are on the mend and I am sure they will not stay down 
in numbers long.

The above figure leaves out $500,000 for the International Coffee 
Organization. What in the world is that? For what I pay for my coffee, that 
organization should have headquarters on their own small island by now.

I am not by any means a bigot but I do believe in caution so believe me 
when I tell you that $3 million to import Muslim students to the U.S. and 
pay for their education scares the living daylights out of me. Sept. 11 is 
still etched in my mind and I realize there is no way to distinguish al 
Qaida from regular Muslims, but I thought this activity had ceased at least 
until the war on terror ends.

OK, it isn't all the fact that they are Muslims. My kids are struggling to 
get their own education as I did. If we can import and educate foreigners 
to fill our institutions of higher learning, what about clean-cut American 
kids who need a break?

My devotion to our National Forests is not a secret and my final paper on 
Yellowstone Wolves was picked up this week by a writing newsletter off my 
own site, so please. Legislation that could cripple our own National 
Forests and endanger their existence has passed the house and we are 
appropriating $3.5 million to the Columbian National Park Service under the 
guise of a counter drug initiative?

The drug war -- as I fear will be true of the war on terror -- has cost 
many American lives and young minds are still being corrupted, ruined and 
lost because the drugs still flow freely into this country and into their 
hands. A billion or trillion dollar industry of tax and duty free income, 
- -- because it is illegal -- is thriving the world over.

I would really like to know what kind of insurance there is for Liberty and 
Democracy. At a $6 million premium, who is collecting the damages? Clearly 
liberty and democracy are in danger and being assaulted -- by the people we 
elect -- so the insurance either isn't working or padding somebody's wallet.

Leaving the foreign appropriations, the Route 66 Festival is this weekend. 
This highway ran from Chicago to Los Angeles. I wonder if the chamber has 
checked into money from the federal government to make this more festive. 
After all, an Alabama representative or senator managed to squeeze out 
$200,000 for their National Peanut Festival in Alabama. Last time I looked 
Alabama did not run coast to coast. Is the Gulf of Mexico even a coast?

Having raised three children of varying personalities, I found that temper 
tantrums were solely the venue of the parent. Teachers did not abide them 
and for my own edification they were not thrown at school - only at home 
and in the most public of public places at the most embarrassing moment.

Having said that, an appropriation of $250,000 for the National Preschool 
Anger Management Project in Iowa to help day-care workers deal with toddler 
temper tantrums had me chuckling for quite some time. You deal with temper 
tantrums by learning to parent correctly -- even teachers without children 
gain parenting skills. However, for the most part $250,000 won't pay for 
many anger management trainees nor will it solve the problem.

As a nation we have been throwing money at dysfunctional behaviors for 
decades and the only thing that works is for the people to manage 
themselves. In addition, there is a dearth of 12-step programs for 
everything from emotions to alcoholism, operating anonymously, successfully 
and completely on contributions of the transient memberships all the way up 
to their national offices. They have learned that if you accept money from 
other places you let in controllers who will only muck up the works with 
bureaucracy while defeating the recovery of the sick.

I have been eating cereal for nigh on 48 years now in my kitchen and my 
living room. Cereal takes up its own aisle in the grocery stores and it 
costs a ton of money unless you catch it on sale with a coupon. Therefore, 
appropriating $8.4 million for a cereal research laboratory is superfluous 
to me. They could give me less than 2 percent of that and I will work for free.

I have been having fun with this column, but it is also serious, dead 
serious. This is spending of American dollars that doesn't take into 
account our everyday lives in America -- except maybe the coffee organization.

There is still talk of looting social security. In fact, though our economy 
has been on a gradual nosedive since 9-11, our national budget has 
increased. As we tighten our belts, someone is letting out theirs -- big time!

And, I really don't object to the Peanut Festival, but get a grip, if we 
don't have money for learning or schools, what exactly is on our 
legislators minds as they pat each other's backs saying, "Yeah buddy, we 
really have to give Texas $90,000 for the Cowgirl Museum and Hall of Fame 
but in order to be fair, let's give Hawaii $7.8 million for their turtles."
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MAP posted-by: Keith Brilhart