Pubdate: Tue, 03 Jun 2003
Source: Whitewood Herald (CN SN)
Copyright: The Whitewood Herald 2003
Contact:  http://www.whitewoodherald.sk.ca/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/2158
Author:  Chris Ashfield

"WAY COOL, MAN!"

"Whoa, dude. This is the most narley thing I've ever heard off. Like, it's 
totally outta here man. Talk about funkadelly. It's even better than that 
bad trip I had on Rolaids -- but only better."

"Yeah, man. Like, so cool. Who would've thunk that we could get away with 
smoking dope, man. I mean, like, cool man... way cool."

"You're absolutely right, dude -- hey, quit hogging the stuff. Remember, it 
is Toke. Toke. Pass."

"Now that smoking weed is not a criminal offense, do you think the dudes on 
the Hill will look at making other things more legal, man?"

"What are you saying dude?"

"Think about it Cheesehead. Like, what if they made it legal to speed?"

"Yeah, dude. Way cool. Then if we had a car, we could get our drugs even 
faster. Awesome!"

"Yeah man, what about if it was legal to like, not register your guns."

"Narley idea -- here try this. It's good stuff. Yeah, if we didn't have to 
register our firearms, we could buy more guns and use them as a smoking pipe."

"Awesome thinking, man. Huh, and they say this stuff makes you stupid. You 
are proving them wrong with that idea, dude."

"Thanks, buddy. Hey, pass the stuff."

"Whoa... what if it was legal to hire prostitutes?"

"Now that would be sweet, dude. Just think how awesome our weekends would 
be. We could get ourselves a hunny, smoke a reafer, get busy for a few 
hours, and never have to worry about being busted."

"Yeah, man. And just think, if prostitution was legal, the dudes in suits 
could put that tax thingy on it and make megga money at it."

"Yeah, man, and then if they did that, maybe we could get more money in the 
country's piggy bank."

"That would be awesome, man. I bet more money would mean more cool stuff 
for us too, dude."

"What kind of cool stuff?"

"Give your toque a twirl, man. If pimps and hoes were taxable, I bet the 
government would raise million or even billions of dollars. If they do 
that, they could give us stuff we need?"

"What, like more or cheaper drugs?"

"No man, they could like restore our health system or use it to reduce 
taxes. I bet they would even have enough cash to restore our armed forces 
to where they should be -- you know, more than one tank."

"You are totally right, dude. And I bet if things like prostitution were 
legal, the crime rate would drop and people would stop transmitting those 
rashes and stuff cause it would be controlled."

"That's so heavy, dude. Hey, want one last toke?"

"Always, man. Thanks. Oh, yeah... that is some good stuff."

"Thanks, man. So do you think we should get back to our jobs, dude?"

"Probably. After all, that's why they elected us."

"You are so right, dude... you are so right."
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MAP posted-by: Alex