Pubdate: Mon, 06 Oct 2003 Source: Montreal Gazette (CN QU) Copyright: 2003 The Gazette, a division of Southam Inc. Contact: http://www.canada.com/montreal/montrealgazette/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/274 Author: Peggy Curan DRUG BATTLE A LONG FIGHT Former Addicts Celebrate Recovery Drug-Free For 15 Months, Single Mother Praises Portage Treatment Program At 14, Louise took drugs for fun. At 17, it was deadly serious."I was taking anything and everything. Drugs, alcohol, glue." Louise, who asked that her last name not be used, then got a job as a barmaid, where she fed her habit sniffing cocaine -- "I could go four days without sleep" -- until an overdose finally scared her. But ask how and when and why her addiction began and this 26-year-old single mother still has to stop and think. She scrolls into her past, recalling how her mother died when she was 5, and she never knew her father at all. Put up for adoption, she says she retreated into an emotional shell from which she is only now emerging. "I want my daughter to have a healthy mother, and for her to be proud of me," she said yesterday, joining 102 other graduates of the Portage addiction treatment program in celebration of their recovery in Place des Arts's Theatre Maisonneuve. In its 30th year, Portage has helped 20,000 substance abusers combat their demons and re-integrate into society by emphasizing self-help and viewing addiction as an outward symptom of a life in crisis. Treatment centres in Quebec, New Brunswick and now Ontario offer programs specifically geared to adults, teenagers, mothers with children, and people with mental illness. Portage claims 85 per cent of those who complete the residential treatment - - usually about six months - remain drug-free. Zack, 17, has been sober for two and a half years. He's looking ahead to finishing high school this year, aiming for a career in radio or business. This from a teen who was smoking marijuana at 11, then moved on to PCP. "I was very depressed, and the drugs were a way to escape." A fight with his older brother made him see he was out of control. "I went to the bathroom to wash my face and I looked like death warmed over," he said. "I had lost everything, my family, my friends. I was turning them against me. They were trying to help, and I would just reject them." Louise said by the time her daughter was born, she had reached rock bottom. Her daughter's father was also a drug user, and showed no signs of wanting to stop. "I was crying everyday, I was very unhappy...I knew I had to do something or I'd kill myself." Desperate, she called Mylene, one of her oldest childhood friends, someone who wasn't part of the wild crowd she'd been hanging with in recent years. Within 15 minutes, her friend had called her back with a referral to Portage's mother-child program. "It's a miracle what's happened," Mylene said yesterday. "She's gone from the absolute depths to an independent, outgoing person with a positive outlook and everything to live for." Louise - drug-free for 15 months - has high praise for the mother-child program, which allowed her to keep her daughter while she got off drugs, polished her parenting skills and rediscovered her long-lost self-esteem. - --- MAP posted-by: Larry Stevens