Pubdate: Thu, 28 Nov 2002 Source: Daily Courier, The (CN BC) Copyright: 2002 The Okanagan Valley Group of Newspapers Contact: http://www.theokanagan.net/ Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/531 Author: Ron Seymour Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/find?218 (Canadian Senate Committee on Illegal Drugs) Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/mjcn.htm (Cannabis - Canada) Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/youth.htm (Youth) PARENTS DON'T BLAME HOCKEY FOR SUICIDE A teenage hockey player may have killed himself because he feared being suspended indefinitely after he was caught smoking marijuana, his family believes. But the parents of Jason Ricciuti say they don't blame his coaches or the minor hockey system for their son's suicide. "We don't hold the hockey association or Jason's coaches responsible at all," Terry Flamond said Wednesday. Family members say there was no sign that Jason, 15, was anxious or distraught, describing him as a happy teenager with lots of friends. They say they can't understand why he hanged himself last Saturday in a Surrey motel room bathroom during a team trip to Vancouver. A coach had earlier discovered Jason and another youngster with some marijuana and warned them they'd face disciplinary action when the team got back to Kelowna. "The coach wasn't yelling at Jason or anything. Jason said that he realized he messed up and was prepared to face the consequences," said Flamond, who has spoken with the coach, other players and team officials. "The coach didn't tell Jason that he was going to be suspended for the rest of the season, but that might have been what Jason thought. That was too much for him to bear, and he made this horribly wrong decision. "It doesn't make any sense at all, but kids sometimes turn little things into the biggest deal," Flamond said. Suicides are rarely covered in the media, but provincial and national news organizations have run several stories on Jason's death. The family dismisses suggestions that the pressures of minor hockey may have played a role in Jason's suicide. "Jason loved hockey. He had a real passion for the game," Flamond said. "And as a goaltender, he thrived on pressure. It didn't bother him one iota. "We never had a single sign that Jason might do something like this," said Flamond. "Jason was a teenager, and he had the emotions of a teenager, but he was a happy kid with a great network of friends." Many of Jason's friends, classmates and teammates have already come by the family's Rutland home. A public memorial service to celebrate Jason's life will be held tomorrow at 10 a.m. at Trinity Baptist Church. While not blaming anyone for Jason's death, his family hopes his suicide may lead to a review of the procedures minor hockey officials follow when dealing with disciplinary matters on a road trip. "Maybe there could be some kind of rule that kids aren't to be left alone, that they're always in the company of an adult or another player, if they've been told they're going to face disciplinary action when the team gets home," Flamond said. And the policy of zero tolerance for the use of drugs such as marijuana, which a Senate report recommended be legalized, could be reconsidered, Flamond said. "Zero tolerance, that's pretty harsh for kids of this age," he said. "As parents, we certainly believe in discipline, but we also know that kids make mistakes." Suicide not always preceded by visible warning signs Some teens who kill themselves never show any signs that they're capable of taking their own life, a youth suicide prevention worker says. Significant changes in behaviour may precede a suicide attempt, but that's not always the case, Colleen Owens says. "There's a certain percentage of people who do suicide that have never shown any of the warning signs," Owens said. "We can talk all we want about the things to look for, ways to prevent suicides, but they still can come right out of the blue," she said. "We can't look inside people's heads and see what's going on." Suicide is the second leading cause of death, after accidental injuries, for teenagers. In 2000, 35 people in B.C. between the ages of 10 and 19 took their own life. While numbers vary from year to year, there has been an overall rise in the number of teens committing suicide, from three of every 100,000 in 1960 to 10 per 100,000 in 2000. First Nations youth, those with mental disorders, such as depression, and those heavily involved with drugs and alcohol are at greatest risk of committing suicide, experts say. While such factors play a big role, other youths may contemplate suicide as a reaction to short-term issues, such as problems with friends or a feeling that parents are being over-demanding. "Some youths are unable to see into the future as adults do," said Owens, who works out of Kelowna Community Resources. "Most adults will realize that, as bad as things may be, time has a way of lessening problems. But some teens think the pain they're experiencing will never go away." Some warning signs that a teen may be suicidal: significant changes in behaviour, such as becoming unusually quiet or aggressive; loss of interest in regular activities; engaging in high-risk behaviours such as driving dangerously or drug use; writing poetry or drawing artwork relating to death. * For more information, visit www.youthsuicide.ca - --- MAP posted-by: Terry Liittschwager