Pubdate: Tue, 08 Oct 2002
Source: Denver Post (CO)
Copyright: 2002 The Denver Post Corp
Contact:  http://www.denverpost.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/122
Author: Ed Quillen

WANT BILL GATES' PHONE NUMBER?

Tuesday, October 08, 2002 - For the past fortnight or so, it's been hard to 
watch a Colorado TV station for more than a few minutes without 
encountering a commercial that goes something like this:

"Are you tired of having an attorney general who defends sweetheart deals 
made by the State Land Board? Do you want an attorney general who ignores 
the expressed will of Colorado voters and threatens to turn medical 
marijuana users over to the feds? Sick of supporting Animas-La Plata and 
other water boondoggles with your tax dollars?

"Then call Ken Salazar and tell him you want an attorney general who 
represents you, rather than the developers, the drug war and the diverters."

A phone number then flashes on the screen so quickly that it barely 
registers, let alone provides the time to write it down just in case you 
actually did want to call. There's also some brief text which tells you who 
paid for the ad - always an opponent or the opposing party. (I want to 
point out that, to her credit, the candidate who will get my vote for 
attorney general, Green Party nominee Alison "Sunny" Maynard, has not run 
any such ads.)

Most responsible people decry these "negative" ads, but I feel compelled to 
point out that they have some entertainment value, or at least Republican 
Sen. Wayne Allard's commercials do. They give us a number to call so that 
we can tell someone how disgusted we are at Democratic challenger Tom 
Strickland for being a "millionaire lawyer- lobbyist."

These are entertaining because they inspire thoughts of something that will 
never happen - a statement from Allard along these lines:

"In keeping with the populist nature of my re-election campaign this year, 
I am returning any and all donations I may have received from millionaires, 
lawyers or lobbyists, since we have come to learn that they are all evil 
people who do not have the public interest at heart. I also pledge that if 
you, the voters of Colorado, see fit to return me to the U.S. Senate, I 
will not meet at any time in any place, in public or in private, with any 
millionaires, lawyers or lobbyists and I will resign my office if I am ever 
seen in the presence of one of these miscreants.

"I know, you have trouble believing that I will keep my word, given how 
easily that Tom Tancredo and Scott McInnis betrayed their promises 
concerning term limits ."

The main problem with these "call my opponent and give him an earful" ads, 
though, is not the hypocrisy of a well-funded Republican candidate whose 
commercials imply that there's something wrong with millionaires. It's that 
ads like these could actually perform a useful public service - if they 
gave you enough time to write down the telephone numbers and if they gave 
you the appropriate telephone numbers.

For instance, who wouldn't pay close attention to an ad like this:

"Tired of getting told how your local telephone monopoly doesn't have the 
money to improve your service? Disgusted that this company somehow finds 
the money to pay Joe Nacchio $30,000 a week even after he was forced to 
resign after he led the company to the brink of bankruptcy? Then call Phil 
Anschutz, the major shareholder in Qwest, and let him know how you feel." 
Then for a minute or two, the TV displays a list of private-line numbers 
that ring right through to the billionaire's desk, along with cell numbers, 
fax numbers, personal e-mail accounts, etc.

You might reach for the pencil on this one: "Do you think public radio 
should be local community radio, rather than some aspiring centralized 
monopoly that doesn't run public-service announcements? Does this really 
gall you at fundraising time? Then don't call the pledge line. Call one of 
these numbers, and let Max Wycisk know how you feel ."

And millions of people would be racing for the phones if some public- 
spirited organization ran this ad:

"Don't you just love that Blue Screen of Death? You've got work to do, and 
then you read that 'A fatal exception has occurred at 015F:BHFF9DBA7. The 
current application will be terminated.' Or do you prefer the announcement 
that 'An error has occurred in your program. To keep working anyway, click 
Ignore and save your work in a new file,' except that you can't save 
anything and your only recourse is to find the hardware reset? Or maybe 
it's the Klez virus that makes your day.

"Whatever it is, call Bill Gates and tell him how you feel ."

So, let's quit criticizing the political consultants for devising negative 
ads. Instead, let's persuade them to run useful negative ads.
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MAP posted-by: Jo-D