Pubdate: Mon, 17 Jun 2002
Source: State Journal-Register (IL)
Copyright: 2002 The State Journal-Register
Contact:  http://www.sj-r.com/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/425
Author: Kris Wernowski
Bookmark: http://www.mapinc.org/meth.htm (Methamphetamine)

ROAD TO RECOVERY HARD FOR METH ADDICT

Brandee Sanders, who grew up in Pana, describes her childhood as
normal - until she was 13.

"Around 13 is when I started getting into drugs - marijuana, smoking
it out of a soda pop can."

Sanders is participating in a court-ordered rehabilitation program at
the Triangle Center in Springfield.

The 19-year-old gets to see her two children for only a few hours at a
time as they are in the custody of the Illinois Department of Children
and Family Services. At a time when most people her age are enjoying
the fruits of youth, Sanders' day consists of meetings, chores and
group therapy, all because she became addicted to methamphetamine.

Sanders was introduced to meth by her boyfriend, the father of her two
children, in 1998.

"About three years ago, he started making it and it just went on from
there. I started smoking it, and I couldn't stop."

Sanders' boyfriend, who is going to prison for manufacturing meth,
began selling the drug because it was an easy way to make money. He
also was tired of going out and buying the drug, one of the reasons
many meth users become manufacturers.

"You're never tired," Sanders said. "I would smoke a couple foils, and
I would be up for two or three days at a time. We sat around playing
cards for 16 hours straight one time. It gives you a lot of energy."
Sanders' addictions changed her priorities. Instead of spending time
with her children, she spent time getting high.

"I love my kids. I took care of them, but they didn't get the
attention they needed," Sanders said.

After Sanders was arrested, she realized that being in a relationship
with a heavy meth user would make it too difficult to kick her habit.
"I would have never been able to stop if I were still with him," she
said. Now a single parent, Sanders realizes the importance of sobriety
for the sake of her children.

It is her main motivation for quitting. "I was really upset - I knew
the drugs were not worth my kids." The relapse rate for meth is
extremely high, but Sanders said she is focused on her children.

After she leaves the Triangle Center, she wants to finish high school
and become a respiratory therapist.

She understands that in order to be the mother she wants to be, she
cannot do it with meth in her life. She will not return to Pana. "I
know if I go back to Pana, I'll be right back on it," Sanders said.
She plans to live with a sister in Springfield who does not drink or
do drugs. 
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MAP posted-by: Richard Lake