Pubdate: Wed, 24 Oct 2001
Source: Charlotte Observer (NC)
Copyright: 2001 The Charlotte Observer
Contact:  http://www.charlotte.com/observer/
Details: http://www.mapinc.org/media/78
Author: Joe DePriest

MOTHER TO HELP OTHERS DEAL WITH ADDICTION ISSUES

Son Died At Age 17 After Battling Alcohol, Drugs That Stole Personality

BELMONT -- Stephanie Williams remembers the sparkle in her son's blue eyes 
when he played soccer.

And she remembers them bloodshot from alcohol and drugs.

On the soccer field, Brennen Glover could forget his problems and dream of 
playing professionally in Europe.

But addictions overwhelmed him. He died at age 17 in 1999 from what 
authorities called a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

Williams has avoided talking about her son's death. Starting soon, however, 
she will work through the Belmont parish nurse program to discuss drug and 
alcohol issues with parents and children at churches, schools or other forums.

"I know there are lots of kids like Brennen," said Williams, 44, a former 
Belmont resident who lives near Kings Mountain. "I can't help him now, but 
I can try to help others. I can't just let this go. I want to do whatever I 
can."

Cheryl Fleming, a parish nurse sponsored by three Belmont churches, thinks 
Williams can be a forceful voice.

"These problems are pretty widespread," said Fleming, who knew Brennen and 
also chairs Belmont Youth Counseling Services. "I have parents talk to me 
about them all the time. I know some parents are probably suffering in 
silence. Stephanie can raise some awareness."

More than a year ago, Fleming called Williams about doing community 
programs, but they were both busy and lost contact.

They reconnected this month, when the Williams family and others in the 
Belmont area donated $1,000 to the Belmont Abbey College men's soccer team 
in memory of Brennen.

By then, Williams was ready to speak out. Fleming hopes to schedule the 
first program before year's end.

A registered nurse with Hospice of Gaston County for 16 years, Fleming is 
Gaston's first parish nurse and serves the whole Belmont area, which 
includes 55 churches.

A parish nurse is a health educator, advocate and counselor who can help 
people get medical help..

Fleming, who has presented programs on substance abuse and teen smoking, 
thinks Williams can make a big impact.

"She has a story that needs to be told," Fleming said.

Williams grew up in Belmont, graduated from South Point High School in 1975 
and married at age 19.

"All I wanted to be was a wife and mother," she said. "That's all that 
mattered to me."

Brennen was born Jan. 15, 1982. By age 4, he'd discovered soccer - a sport 
he loved more each year.

"He was a handsome boy, real gregarious and with a zillion friends," 
Williams said. "He was every mother's dream child."

Brennen's parents divorced when he was 6. His mom remarried two years later.

By the ninth grade, Williams noticed changes in her once-happy little boy.

She smelled alcohol on his breath and found marijuana traces in his room.

"He got kind of withdrawn," Williams recalled. "The bubbles in his 
personality were gone."

When they talked, Williams said, her son admitted he was into alcohol, 
pills and pot, but that he lacked the willpower to refuse them.

"He told me, 'I'm just a loser, Mom,'" she recalled.

When he left South Point High in the 10th grade, his mom enrolled him in a 
high school program at Gaston College. But the problems didn't stop: He was 
charged with driving while impaired and then developed epilepsy that was 
unrelated to alcohol or drug use.

Sessions with psychologists and psychiatrists went nowhere.

Over Labor Day weekend in 1999, while she and her husband were at Myrtle 
Beach, Williams said, Brennen invited friends over although he'd been 
warned against it.

Williams said Brennen was standing in the driveway when he shot himself in 
the mouth with his stepfather's handgun.

"He didn't plan it - the alcohol and drugs did it," she said. "The drugs 
won. It's just that simple."

Williams blames nobody.

To anyone who'll listen, she wants to talk about the problems that took her 
son.

"I know the subject," Williams said. "All too well."
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MAP posted-by: Lou King