Pubdate: Tue, 04 Jul 2000
Source: Post-Courier (New Guinea)
Copyright: 2000, Post-Courier
Contact:  P.O. Box 85, Port Moresby, National Capital District, Papua New Guinea
Fax: (675) 320 1781
Website: http://www.postcourier.com.pg

FAMILY RESPONSIBILITY TOWARDS DRUG ABUSE

FAMILIES are not just places where children are conceived and brought
forth or where food and shelter are provided, there is more to these.

A family is the most fundamental institution in which a child develops
and becomes a responsible and caring adult in society. It is a place
where children are trained emotionally, socially, spiritually and
given model skills required for their adult lives. To become model
citizens, children depend very much on the family where they are born
and raised, if this does not happen, the family fails and children are
out on the streets looking for ways to cope with life and drug abuse
is no exception.

Today Papua New Guinea is experiencing an alarming increase in drug
abuse problems and the National Narcotics Bureau is now focusing on
the family to find ways to combat the problem.

Director of the Education and Awareness division Maku Maruse believes
it is time for families, mainly parents, to pull their acts together
and help their children stay away from drugs.

"A human life if a gift of God the Father and as parents and as
teachers, we have to play our role but we should always seek help from
the father,"' Mr Maruse said.

He believes that with the help from Heavenly Father parents will be
strengthened to raise, mould and shape their children into adults that
God and the society wants them to be.

So what are some of the roles that parents and family members can play
in the prevention of drug abuse by their children? Parents can do the
following:

Sustainable home life Home life is important in the rearing of
children. Parents are key personal, they are the first teachers, if
they fail in their duty as parents, their children's lives will surely
go to pieces. An unhappy home Is the breeding ground for all ills
(evils), socially, psychologically and morally. The future of your
children depends on you parents. If parents are disorganized they can
easily set bad examples to their children. If they are too busy to
look after their children or are not able to manage them properly the
children will end up being in the wrong company.

Discipline Carefully controlled discipline at home is very important
and in modern society today is very absolute. Modern men and women
tend to equate discipline with restriction; a deterrent to personal
freedom. While maintaining some form of control, parents must ensure
their children have freedom in life particularly in decision making,
but parents must always point out the disadvantages and advantages of
what certain decisions can do for their children.

Role models Today most men and women are not ready to be parents and
are not fit to be parents. They themselves are victims of conditions
of unhealthy social and moral conditions of modern life. Young people
learn from adults. If a parent is a drinker or a smoker, you can be 70
per cent sure that your children will follow your example.

Love and care Parents must do their best to look after their children
with love and care to gain respect and confidence. Each child must be
made to feel important and must be given attention so that he feels
part of the family in which he is in. Parents must spend time with
each of their children from the time they are infants to adolescence
so that their development at each stage is safe. When children feel
they are loved, they have self-esteem and they know they are valued.

Involvement in Church and Sports activities Children must be
encouraged to participate in Church and Sports activities to lead a
good life. IN Children who take part in Sports have their minds busy
and occupied. In Church activities, children and adolescents must be
assisted to get involved early in life. In these modern days,
teenagers tend to think that Church activities are only for older
people, which is very wrong. Church groups should have programs that
involve all age groups.

There are times when communication between parents and their children
becomes difficult. When such parents experience such times how should
they encourage their children to seek their guidance.

Rephrase a child's or your children's comments to show you understand.
This is sometimes called reflecting listening and it serves three
purposes. One your child knows that you had what he said, it allows
your child to hear what he said and consider his or her feelings and
it is a reassurance that you correctly understood your child.

Watch for your child's face and body language Often a child will
assure you that he or she does not feel sad, but a quivering chin or
too bright eyes will tell you otherwise. When words and body languages
say two different things, always believe the body language. Give
non-verbal support and encouragement This may include a smile, a hug,
a wink, a pat on the shoulder, nodding your heard, making eye contact
or reaching for your child's hand. Use the right voice for the answer
you are giving. Remember that your voice tone communicates as a clear
as your work.

Use encouragement phrases to show your interest and keep the
conversation going. Give lots of praise, for efforts as well as
accomplishment; help your child set realistic goals; when correcting,
criticise the action not the child; give your child responsibility;
and show your child you love him or her.
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